i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
