Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
