she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize