i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
