What a fucking waste of an outfit
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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