My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
