Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
