Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
