I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize