I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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