After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
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