Define "chronic" masturbator.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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