people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
