I want to stick my p in your. b.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
this just has baby written all over it
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
