so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Randomize
