whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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