I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
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