New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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