im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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