Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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