Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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