But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
