wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
