Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize