I cannot find my penis.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
