After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
