She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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