this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
