bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
