One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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