You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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