and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
