I must be too annoying 4 u.
hotel room ftw
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
