it was like his penis was on wheels.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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