I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
