does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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