You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Randomize
