so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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