Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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