i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
