D3 body, D1 cock
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
