Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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