you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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