he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Randomize
