You work out of a Hotel?
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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