I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
