A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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