I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
