proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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