Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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