Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
